Bad Afternoon Jokes

 I am not a believer in seances, but I went to one just to see what they are like. The psychic was doing his thing and grinning from ear to ear. I assumed his merriment was due to the fact that he was fooling a gullible public and gave him a poke in the nose. You can probably guess the rest

I was arrested for striking a happy medium.

---

I was in a motorcycle shop few weeks ago, and met a real motorcycle enthusiast. He was complaining because he couldn't decide whether to buy a bike with a high top speed and poor acceleration, or one with lots of torque and a fast acceleration but a poor top speed.
Eventually he decided on the second one. It cost $500 less.
After all,

torque is cheap.